my failure, my story

Today & rsquo; hui I am writing you surely one of the most intimate items from my blog. Even if you talk about diet or my life everyday is also, but I just tell you about what is the biggest failure that ever happened to me. J & rsquo; it hard to talk about because I don & rsquo; m not proud and I do not always feel understood, but I, who shares much of my life with you, it's time to explain everything to you.

You know my path, criminologist can not practice in France, I returned to my first love which are the film and the show. If you want a more complete article on my career n & rsquo; not hesitate to tell me and I will be a joy to the & rsquo; writing.

In 2012, j & rsquo; opens a self-organization in order to bill my photographer activities, graphic designer, community manager… J & rsquo; really love what I do and I'm happy to start my.

During these early years or j & rsquo; started creating my website, I make customers… j & rsquo; did superb meetings. People like Krystel, Nolan and darling that m & rsquo; helped her gain confidence in myself, in my work and that work was a real pleasure.

It launches

In 2014, carried by all our work and this positivity, je décide de lancer une “real” société. With hindsight, I think I got a little quickly packed for nothing… I don & rsquo; had had no real use, j & rsquo; have been able to continue a bit with the & rsquo; self-company. But I & rsquo; d & rsquo had lots; ideas, d & rsquo; cravings, this was more serious and we can do more.

C & rsquo; Thus was born a few months later the company AthénaProd, the name of my labrador, to whom I owe a lot because I l & rsquo; have had a complicated time in my life and it m & rsquo; he saved. This company c & rsquo; was officially mine because I & rsquo; had it invested my savings, but for me it & rsquo; was the company with friends. We all had a lot of different skills, so we could offer a lot of different services to our customers. Of the picture, de la vidéo, retouching, graphic, but also his, light.

So surrounded that I could & rsquo; be motivated to give my all. Except that to be honest, I threw myself into the & rsquo; unknown… no business plan, no & rsquo; market research. Just passionate artists who wish to live their passion.

Create a company c & rsquo; is time and d & rsquo; investment. It must canvass customers, create website, to advertise, s & rsquo; address social networks. All this set up we started to have customers, step by step.

Then Nolan parties live in Guadeloupe, we lost a member of the & rsquo; team. Krystel has also continued to turn his work as a photographer.

We stayed with my darling (Thibault) and society, with a friend who accompanied us to film the videos on certain benefits.

When you are self-company, you do not take a lot of risks. If you do not come home d & rsquo; money, you don & rsquo; have no charge. What n & rsquo; is not the case with a company… you have to pay your accountant, taxes on companies, make assessments every year… and all this is very expensive.

Thibault was at the same time as still intermittent light console operator as he & rsquo; had always been. But we was easy to fit everything in terms of events and we needed & rsquo; be present all 2. We do not were winning fortunes with the company, I do not poured me a salary and living with my savings, but we were on the right track.

Being alone

Subsequently Thibault s & rsquo; was offered a permanent contract at Disneyland for his work in the light. That & rsquo; he accepted because c & rsquo; was the best for him and his career.

So that I found myself alone with the company. Even s & rsquo; he was still trying d & rsquo; be present to m & rsquo; help him but it was much more difficult.

Work from home, alone, is complicated but I & rsquo; ve always loved it. But I must admit that & rsquo; after all that I & rsquo; have let go… We also changed rhythm of life at home, I saw less darling, and if I take a step back now, I think that & rsquo; with these changes, j & rsquo; was close to depression. J & rsquo; spent much stashed under my duvet day instead of getting up for work…

Without motivation it is difficult to canvass customers. I continued through word of mouth have always pretty pictures and sometimes video contracts for weddings.

The problem in this environment, c & rsquo; is that when you're not part of & rsquo; news, you disappear… during this difficult j & rsquo period have very little shot. Only marriages to earn some d & rsquo; money but nothing that I could do d & rsquo; others and that I & rsquo; d & rsquo loved more, elsewhere. And unwittingly, I fell in & rsquo; oblivion. Models didn & rsquo; called for more work with her and I galérais to find characters for my projects. Even graphics and Other clients were scarce.

It was actually sublime things during these years… including this shoot makes me even so proud aujourd & rsquo; hui….

The beginning of the end

Days passed and I don & rsquo; had more than my wedding guests. Honestly I didn & rsquo; thrived at all by going for wedding pictures and I lost my love for my profession, my passion. The only time I felt good doing the photo c & rsquo; was traveling.

Except that I & rsquo; started to lose confidence in me… Over the same time I wanted to travel no longer pictures… I did not feel any of the competent, So when I & rsquo; had the ideas & rsquo; angles and place, I let Thibault generally do.

J & rsquo; have therefore stopped work for weddings because it made me unhappy… and obviously you can imagine the result, it began to be difficult financially. J & rsquo; I started to look for work, at a time j & rsquo; I even apply to be a cashier, I don & rsquo; had more desire to do anything, just not want to put us in a dirty condition level under… one m & rsquo; said repeatedly that I & rsquo; was overqualified.

You can imagine, to arrange a depression there is better… j & rsquo;'ve sent hundreds of resumes. But n & rsquo; having worked as an employee for several years, I was afraid to recruiters. Even in the show, the movie theater… with my CV which nevertheless was doing very well, (Film School, lot d & rsquo; experience in the show…) it did not work.

stage manager ?

Halfheartedly, after my 7th sends, and suddenly again 6 chess for me, j & rsquo; s got a call from Disneyland Paris for a post show manager. Yes I absolutely did not want to go through my love to find a job at Disney.

L & rsquo; s maintenance & rsquo; very well and 2 semaines plus tard, le 11 Novembre 2017, I began my first day as manager. If you follow me you know that since I am still manager intermittent entertainment, Disney always very regularly and elsewhere.

Why all this talk about aujourd & rsquo; hui ? Because I m & rsquo; s ready to pay the last steps to the final closure of my company AthénaProd… and although aujourd & rsquo; hui j & rsquo; love my job above all, j & rsquo; it hurts the heart of m & rsquo; be planted… already in my head j & rsquo; have difficulty in & rsquo; accept, and all my savings and increased there. I hardly goes back slope financially aujourd & rsquo; hui, despite the fact that I work a lot.

Some of & rsquo; you ask me if I still make pictures.

J & rsquo; have trouble even saying a photographer's my job because I earn more with my life and I & rsquo; love my new job. But my passion for photography is still there.

Athénaprod n & rsquo; is not really dead… c & rsquo; is a brand that m & rsquo; belongs in my own name, and & rsquo; self-company is still so she will always live. With this self-company I continue as soon as I can to provide photo shoots, graphic, community management and all that is also related to the blog. J & rsquo; m trying to & rsquo; care of it as soon as j & rsquo; have free time.

But aujourd & rsquo; hui my job is primarily that of manager, and I do not see myself living doing something else, it changed my life. I was talking to you & rsquo; elsewhere on the blog there for fear of my time life & rsquo; intermittent.

Do I regret ?

NON. Certainly j & rsquo; there I left my savings but I & rsquo; have tried to live my dreams and I & rsquo; have done with people that I & rsquo; love deeply. I am aware that I & rsquo; have been able to lose much if I didn & rsquo; was not awakened in time. For know the, closing a business also costs a lot of & rsquo; money. While this remains the & rsquo; my life failure.

My only wish despite this failure is to continue my work manager, while trying to travel a max (when financially it will get better), to bring you full of beautiful photos. C & rsquo; is also why the blog is, to share with you all this.

To follow my work, everything is on my website www.deborahatlan.com

If you too want to tell me your failures, or your success is ending up in the comments. And if you have questions, n & rsquo; not hesitate